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just a litte bird

It always amazes me what the Lord chooses to use to teach me a lesson. At first, it was just a little bird. But that little red bird taught me a lesson. It took me back to over a year ago when I finally came home to my babies where I should have been all along. It took me back even further to when Webb and I made the decision to home school our children. He took me back to where I needed to be so that He could speak to me. I had gotten to a place where I was just overwhelmed with everything. Being a wife, a mother and a teacher. I wasn't finding the joy in my days that I yearned for. I wasn't finding the joy in each of the children that the Lord has entrusted in my care. "If this is where I am supposed to be, then why is there no joy in it?", was all that I could ask myself. Well I knew that I was where I was supposed. I am to be home taking care of my husband and children. When I was working, this was all that I yearned for. This little bird made me realize that I had the wrong focus. I had been so caught up that day (and previous days) in checking off the boxes of the check list that I missed the opportunities to make joyful moments and memories. I missed opportunities to show my children how much I love and cherish them. How much I want to know them and their interests. I made my checklist my priority.
Since this little bird interrupted our school day a couple weeks back my focus has changed. I still have a checklist, but I give my list to the Lord. I still get a sense of fulfillment out of checking off my boxes. But, I have an overwhelming joy at the end of the day when I can tell my husband about the amazing moments that I have with our children, not just that "we got school done". School is never done in our home. Our lessons go beyond reading, writing and arithmetic and to the hearts. No, I don't keep my focus everyday. And, sometimes I find myself getting caught up in my lists. But, I am a work in progress and at least now I am aware of this fault.
Thank you Lord for sending that little red bird to interrupt our day, to interrupt my life and make me put my focus back on You.

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